10 Important Life Lessons From Our Tita Ng Bayan, Kris Aquino

10 Important Life Lessons From Our Tita Ng Bayan, Kris Aquino

Everything I know about life, I learned from Kris Aquino (or at least, the important parts).

While my parents rightfully take the primary credit for the person I am today, I’d be lying if I said that Tita Krissy did not contribute her fair share of wisdom to me, all of which I live out on a daily basis. Ever since vlog numero uno–a masterpiece of the 21st century–my skin has cleared, my bank numbers have tripled, my stress has vanished, my love life has improved significantly, and order has been restored to planet Earth.

That being said, I have made it my life’s mission to find a way to make her the ninang of my 5 future children.

Here are just 10 out of the many anecdotes from the one and only Kris Aquino–anecdotes that have changed my life, and millions of others, too.

1. Oiliness is next to joblessness

While I initially felt 10/10 attacked by this (my face can be used midday to fry a chicken), there is some truth to it. Gone are the days where blotting sheets were an unnecessary part of my purse. Now, one can find 2 packs at bay–ready to be consumed like a cake in the hands of a fat kid. What once was a face that looked like an overdone Glossier ad is now a fresh canvass, receptive to life’s bountiful blessings (free from unnecessary oil slicks that can trap dirt and clog pores, too).

2. You can never go wrong with white unless bumabagyo

Leave it to Tita Kris to teach us how to serve proper looks in a tropical country such as ours. Weather men all over the world are SHAKING.

3. Being a woman is hard work, and men need to realize that

Spanx may be the greatest invention ever made for women all over the world, but damn, these bitches are hard work to wear. While I am all about the flabs and the rolls and the cellulite-ridden booties, sometimes a little sacrifice is needed in order to look and feel your best (especially in that sleek, black bandage dress that gives you the figure of your dreams).

4. Respect your children

Let them decide what they want for themselves and their future. Parents are meant to guide, not to dictate. Let them soar. See them grow on their own terms. It’s not that hard.

5. Stand your ground

Leave it to Tita Krissy to not just serve the tea, but splash it all over her opponent’s face like the true queen that she is. Take notes, ladies and gentlemen.

6. There is always love to give

No matter who they are or where they come from, always remember that there is love to spare for them–always.

7. Love is humble

In today’s lesson, Tita Krissy teaches us that love is humble–a force of nature that is designed to bring out the best in us, no matter what the situation may be.

8. Love is also hopeful

…no matter how big the loss. Take it from Tita Krissy.

9. To deadma is divine

Learn how to be zero percent affected, always. 

10. And most importantly…

If you can’t beat ‘em, buy ‘em.

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